Jose and Ines's Diary

Parenting a Crystal Child the Conscious Way: No 9

Gabriel Discovers the World Out There!

Hi All

04/05/2005

The past three weeks have been interesting… during one of the Starchild meetings, Gabriel grew more and more irritable and Celia could see his energy spinning in a big way. After talking about certain issues it came through that first of all Gabriel was getting frustrated at staying home and missing the lack of more interaction with kids his own age and Inês had also become a bit frustrated because she wasn't getting any time to do her own stuff like continue her studies or even spend some quiet time in the garden. Crystal children need to interact with others, they are community based individuals, and Crystal moms need a break every now and then!

So here we went on a mission to find a day-care center for him to spend the mornings, which we, and him, thought would suit him. We found the first one and from first impressions it looked nice, however when Inês went to drop him off for the first day she saw kids inside running around with toy guns and then a day carer smacking a toddler's bum. She was not impressed and when she confronted the main carer she simply said "Guns were part of the world"… not in ours so we decided to skip that one (good luck to that center and may they see one day that there is no need for violence).

So off we went to another one… this time we had the experience to ask if toy guns and smacking was part of the curriculum… it wasn't. We went to what would be Gabriel's class and I noticed 4 crystal children… I asked Gabriel what he thought of the day carer and he seemed to feel ok with her as she was pretty caring and clearly showed a love for what she does. I felt the need to ask her what was her view of children in terms of - were they merely there to learn from her or did the opposite apply? We were pleased to hear she felt the latter.

So Gabriel started last week Monday and first day was ok. He hardly seemed to notice we were gone. Upon fetching him though he was not so pleased. We also noticed that the other kids all had runny noses (autumn here)… so Gabriel also got a runny nose - it seems as if he absorbed his new surroundings energy and had to find a way of transcending it. Wednesday was a public holiday so he stayed at home but by Thursday he really didn't want to stay at the day-care center. It really breaks a parent's heart to have to leave your child crying his eyes out. :-( But we were strong and thought it was for the greater good. He would eventually learn that we weren't going to abandon him there forever and that actually the socializing would be fun.) Later on that day Inês felt the need to go to the doctor just to make sure that he was all right health-wise and her intuition was right because he had picked up a ear infection.

Anyway today is Tuesday and it seems it was a better day (I for the past days also felt the need to fill the room with rainbows and dolphins, and ask the fairies to go visit the children just to make him more at home). Even though he cried when we left he still waved us goodbye! :-) And the day carer mentioned at the end of the morning that even though he still didn't play much with the other children, that overall he had eaten better and even shared a laugh with them.

So even though this has been sort of a traumatic week for all three of us, it's starting to seem that it was the "right" choice at this point in time.

We have also noticed how he really wants to participate and experience in all we do and actually makes a fuss if he's not part of something. Even when someone vacuum cleans the house he also wants to partake in that! :-) In a way maybe trying to show us how we should be in a community, having the willingness to participate and help out where needed. He's definitively going to be a good husband/partner! ;-)

Love and light

Jose, Inês & Gabriel

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